(Originally posted in Facebook on April 3, 2019)
Yesterday, I had a really interesting opportunity. Every month, there is a prayer luncheon for working women at the local Salvation Army office. It’s always a fun time of fellowship with a good message for the month. Yesterday, I was asked to share what M and I have been going through with his diagnosis.
All of the women in the group were so lovely and so supportive! Those who have dealt with family members with the same dementia diagnosis all said “You’re going to have to be EXTREMELY patient.” I think we’ve talked about me and the fact that I have no patience. That really is my number one struggle.
Last night, M said that he had stopped at the gas station on the way home and the gas credit card hadn’t worked. He couldn’t explain why it hadn’t worked for him, just that he was unable to get gas using it. He did remember that I didn’t want him to use his debit card at the gas pump (yay!) and came home without getting gas. I rode back to the gas station with him, watched him use the gas credit card and it worked just fine. I don’t know what the problem was earlier, unless it was asking for his zip code and he was inputting his debit card four-digit code instead.
Then, when it was time for bed, he said that the dogs had gotten mud on his bed and he was going to change his sheets. I got a new set of sheets out for him and a clean comforter, while he put the dirty sheets and comforter in the wash. When he made the bed, he only put the bottom (fitted) sheet and the comforter on the bed. When I said something about not having put on the top sheet, he said “What difference does it make?”
And it doesn’t matter. It’s not important. If he wants to sleep with just the comforter, it’s fine. But I was tired, I had worked all day, I guess I’m still not feeling 100% and that just ran all over me. I snatched up that top sheet and marched it back down the hall to the linen closet. And the whole way there, I could hear the women from lunch saying “you’re going to have to be extremely patient” and I wanted to have a fit!! Sometimes I think it’s a wonder I haven’t just exploded into a million tiny pieces.
Then I take a deep breath and remind myself that it really doesn’t matter. Sheets and debit cards aren’t the important things. I’m going to get there!!