As M’s dementia progresses, I’ve seen his moods change in ways it never did before. He’s much more sentimental than he ever used to be, cries more easily and is more easily distracted and bored by things he used to be very interested in. He’s always had a temper, but that seems to have cooled down.
Over the weekend, we spent Sunday afternoon and evening watching our two-year-old grandson while the rest of his family went snow tubing. We had a fun time, playing in the yard, watching Mickey Mouse cartoons and eating grilled cheese. Earlier in the afternoon, M and I talked about how long the family was going to be gone and what time we would be heading home. We got a text from our daughter-in-law around 6:30, letting us know they were on their way home and would see us around 8 pm. I told M about it and he was fine.
For about 30 minutes.
Then he suddenly got all bent out of shape and snapped at me “You need to call them and tell them we need to get home. I need to see my dogs.”
I just looked at him and laughed. The kids weren’t going to get there any faster, just because he decided it was so. They were on their way home, they would be there soon enough. There was no point in having a fit and trying to hurry them along.
And he was fine. The dogs were fine. We got home, saw the dogs and M was able to get his shower and get into bed. All was well.
But we had almost the same thing happen Sunday morning when we got up. I was watching TV and M had gone upstairs to put his clothes on. Everything was fine when he went upstairs, but when he came back down, he was sad and depressed. It took question after question to get to the bottom of what he was thinking/feeling.
FINALLY, he said he felt like he doesn’t do anything around here. Okay . . . I understand how that could make you feel bad, but what happened while he was changing clothes? And if he wants to do something around here . . . believe me, there’s plenty to do. Dusting, vacuuming, cleaning the bathrooms . . . the work never seems to end. I’m not stopping him!
But I’m also not seeing him pitching in, either.